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Inspiration

Defuse upsets in intervene could escalate the situation, and you could
become the target of someone's rage. Get to a safe place
four easy steps and phone 911 if the incident looks dangerous.

You've got this
Luckily, most of us are unlikely to face such a situation.
here is no denying these are especially challeng- The upsets you face might be more numerous than usual,
ing times. COVID-19 is affecting people from but you can generally handle them the same way you've
all walks of life across the globe. Folks who handled similar situations in the past. Certain steps can be
T are either lucky enough to not be personally taken whether you're dealing with co-workers, customers,
impacted or are able to adapt quickly to negative events friends or family. Here are my suggestions:
are perhaps not suffering, but it's likely they know people
who have been harmed by this pandemic through com- 1. Remain calm and listen: Use all the active
promised health, loss of loved ones or loss of livelihood. listening skills you've been honing in your
business. Let the person have their say. Let
With people under more stress than usual, tempers can them know through body language, facial
flare when they otherwise would not. And sometimes expression and words that you are listening.
anger might be directed straight at you or someone And do not condescend, talk over them or try
near you by co-workers, customers, family members, to correct them. Do not become defensive and
neighbors—even total strangers. take what the person is saying personally. Aim
to gain and understanding of what the upset is
When it comes to angry strangers — for example, a and let them know they're being heard.
patron at a retailer who refuses to wear a mask and spits
on the employee charged with addressing the situation 2. Give empathetic feedback: Put yourself in
— I believe it's best to leave the vicinity. Attempting to the upset person's shoes and recap verbally
your understanding of what they've just said.
Number their points, if possible, which helps
them focus in a more intellectual and less
emotional way. Don't be judgmental. Convey
that you understand what they are going
through.
3. Be supportive and solutions oriented: Let
them know you are there to help. Ask them
for ideas on possible solutions and offer some
of your own. List what your next steps will
be, and let them know you are committed to
resolving the situation.

4. Aim high: Remind the person of what
brought you together in the first place, what
your common mission is, and the value of
working through difficulties to reach your
common goals. And reiterate your commitment
to finding a resolution acceptable to all.

As Linda Larsen, a motivational speaker and author
said, anger is a normal, healthy emotion. "Sometimes,
people can allow their anger to cloud their judgment
and negatively impact their behaviors," she wrote
in Speaking of Women's Health. "Remember: when the
other person is angry and upset and you are calm,
then you are in control of the situation."

Kate Gillespie, President and CEO
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